3 Secrets Men Wish You Knew Pt.1 | Dating Advice by Marni Battista

3 Secrets Men Wish You Knew Pt.1 | Dating Advice by Marni Battista

Please subscribe and share this video With your friends Hi i'm marnie batista from dating with Dignity and congratulations i am so Excited you are here because you are About ready to learn how to be 10 better Than 90 Of the women in the dating pool so that Men Notice you Wanna date you wanna date you again and Ultimately fall madly in love with you Now here's the thing What i know is that sometimes we date The same guy with a different face over And over again and we get the same bad Results So what i do best is i help you to stop That completely once and for all Fall in love with yourself and then find Someone amazing to love so here's how We're gonna do it there are three videos In this training series and it's called Three secrets men wish you knew now i Want to tell you ladies right away this Is not something that you are going to Get from an online article or a magazine In fact women who watch these videos and Master the information i'm going to Teach you they send me emails i get a Lot of them and they say You know what i've been in therapy i've Been doing this work but this approach Is something i've never heard and i have

Had more transformation and more shifts Inside of this 15 minutes So guess what three videos we're getting Started now three secrets men wish you Knew and the first secret is get ready Wait for it You're leaking Are you ready to dig in These are the three secrets men wish you Knew and i am marnie batista you are Dating with dignity guru to help you Figure out how you can start dating the Men you want and not those men that You've been getting so let's get started So what are those three secrets Well the first one we're gonna dig into Big time today and that is That you're leaking So what do i mean by your leaking Well ultimately Whatever you're wearing however great You look whatever it is that you've done To sort of pump yourself up for a date It doesn't matter if There are unconscious thoughts Feelings beliefs and attitudes That are ultimately Radiating out onto the world onto your Date And so then it doesn't matter what's Going on externally You're leaking And men know and it can cause them to Disappear

To vanish To give you the impression that the date Was amazing only to find out that They don't call back So today we're going to understand Why you're leaking Why it's important to understand what Leaking really looks like and then we're Going to come up with some specific Strategies to stop Stop that leaking so that you can Actually put out a message into the Universe to the men that you're with That's positive that's attractive and Will ultimately magnetize men toward you Now in the rest of the video training We're going to discover the other Secrets and we'll go into those in more Detail but number two is select wisely And i'm going to be teaching you Something that will blow you away you're Going to be able to understand how to Find the player You're going to be able to understand What it takes to figure out who is Really relationship ready and you will Be able to distinguish between the men Who are So close but not quite it And then finally in the third video i'm Going to tell you something getting men To commit is counter intuitive and That's why for most of us it's baffling We cannot figure out how to do it but

Stay with me because by the end of this Training series you're gonna understand Exactly what you need to do to get those Good guys to commit So let's dig in to The leaking piece And we're going to start off by talking About what i call romantic ruts now a Romantic rut is where you repeat the Same dating pattern again Again And again Now i have a client named chris who came To me and she was really really Frustrated because in all the Relationships she had She was really into the guy she wanted To land him she wanted to get him And she got left In an engagement session with the Therapist yup she was there working out The details premarital counseling and Her fiance says i don't want to marry You Fast forward she gets married to another Guy One year into the marriage He turns to her and he says i don't want To be married anymore. And then she falls into a pattern of Fear and dating men who just really Aren't right for her because she's Terrified that they're going to leave So she came to me and she said i have to

Stop this rut so that i can finally Break free from the past and start to Really do what it takes to not only Attract a great guy but but keep him and Be open and be vulnerable And once she was able to really identify Her romantic rut She was able to stop the pattern So one of the first things that i want You to do is create what i call a Patterning tool The vicious cycle Now the vicious cycle allows you to Write out exactly what it is that your Romantic rut Looks like So what you have to do is get out a Piece of paper and a pencil if you don't Already And draw a big giant circle And at the top of that circle i want you To write out what it is that your Biggest pattern is your biggest fear So it might be That it starts out And you get really excited about a guy And you start to believe that maybe he's The one So that's the beginning of your romantic Rut of your vicious cycle Now in that circle you're going to draw A little arrow and go down to like two Or three o'clock And inside of that space you want to

Think what happens next what do i think What do i feel And what do i do So in that case it might be i meet a guy Get really excited about him and We go out on a date and i get really Nervous i start to think What if he doesn't like me anymore what If i do something wrong And maybe what you do your actions are Maybe you talk too much or you start to Interview him or you start Saying things that are sort of humorous Yet self-deprecating So what happens next So now you're going to draw another Little arrow in your vicious cycle and Now you're maybe at five or six o'clock What happens what do you think what do You feel What do you do Well so now the date's over and you Start to worry that maybe somehow you Screwed it up you start obsessively Looking at your phone you start to Imagine text that you might send him and Maybe for some of you you do you start Checking in you start sending messages You start to get a little anxious and Begin to pursue you need some sort of Confirmation you want to feel in control That yes in fact he likes you you want Validation What happens next so as we work our way

Back up around this circle this clock Now we're maybe at eight or nine o'clock What happens next Maybe he does start to pull away and you Start to wonder what did i do wrong Maybe you even reach out to him and say I don't understand i thought you were Into this Or maybe you go into a pattern of forget It i'm never dating again you delete his Number and you pretend that it's over What happens next now for you it could Go anyway right so for some of us we do Pull away and then he comes back and Then we start all over at the top of That circle i meet a guy and i think Maybe this is gonna be it Or maybe he vanishes We beat ourselves up and we wonder What's wrong with us we ask all our Friends or maybe we go right back online And desperately try to find someone to Play replace him but at the end we all End up back at the top of that circle Stuck Now here's what i want you to know Every arrow Is what i call a choice point And from this moment on ladies the Lights are on the floodlights have Opened up You know what your romantic rut is and Now it's your responsibility inside of That choice point to make a different

Choice You get to change a thought You get to change a feeling Or you get to change an action And i know from doing this with hundreds And thousands of ladies that if you can Move out of your rut of your cycle and Make a different choice You will be on the road To freedom To love to self-confidence And attracting those men that you want Not those guys that you've been getting That land you right back stuck in your Romantic rut Now here's the deal inside of this Romantic rut You're putting out a message So remember when we talked about the Thoughts and the feelings that are in Each one of those those arrows I'm not enough what's wrong with me does He still like me Men don't really fall for me they think I'm great but then they lose interest I'm not relationship material i'm not Good i don't know how to commit Here's the deal When i interview men what they say is That all of the thoughts that roll Through your brain when you're spinning Out of control laying in bed at night or Looking in the mirror examining your Thighs

They Hear it because you are putting That out into the universe Unconsciously And as a result it will impact who you Attract because Like attracts like we're going to talk About this a lot in video number two When we talk about them animals But ultimately what i want you to know Is that because of these unconscious Thoughts it's impacting who you're Attracting and when you do meet those Really great relationship-ready guys They can unconsciously Hear those messages And it causes them To question whether or not you are a Good match So let's dig into this a little bit Further So there's two sorts of messages that You're putting out there into the Universe One is the awesomeness Message it's the i'm confident i'm Worthy Men love me i'm a great catch And those thoughts feelings and actions Are what we call anabolic they're Positive they're nurturing they're Healthy They actually help you thrive and grow And live at your optimum

The other thoughts those thoughts that Show up in that vicious cycle are what We call catabolic thoughts And those ladies are what we do not want To get out into the universe Catabolic thoughts Put out messages of i have to fight to Get what i want You better like me or it's your loss Or i can't really trust everyone And maybe even i have to protect myself Or i'm definitely going to get hurt and I'll never let what happened to me in The past happen again Catabolic thoughts can also be I'm not worth it Ugh why bother it never works for me What did i do wrong this time You might have all of those you might Have some of those or you might just Have one but whatever it is those Catabolic thoughts feelings and actions Are stirred up and then they're Projected into that message that you're Broadcasting And as a result you end up attracting as I said before those certain men And then you get engaged again and again And again in those romantic ruts So in order to change the result We have to go right to the core What are those catabolic thoughts those Beliefs that you have And what can we do to start to unwind

And unravel them So that you start to have anabolic Thoughts feelings and actions which will Then of course impact So that you have positive results and Attract amazing men Now what we have here is actually what i Call the energetic self-perception chart And ultimately what it says and i love This because for anyone who is process Oriented and likes structure we actually Have a numerical Ranking Of those thoughts and you can understand Energetically what numerical level you Are at So let's look at it more closely We talked about those catabolic thoughts And in this model we call those Energetic frequencies at level one and Level two So level one Is that victim thinking but it's not Victim like boohoo poor me you know i'm Under the covers eating bon bons crying Myself to sleep Strong smart women Are having level one thoughts in a Different sort of way And it looks like Uh why bother i have a weight on my Shoulders This is just too much i'm lethargic Sometimes i just don't even feel like

Dating Does that sound like you When you're in that level one catabolic Energy level You feel like the world is happening to You You feel like maybe Men in your town just Aren't there or maybe you feel like all The good guys are taken and ultimately It leaves you with this place of what i Call the ugg factor it's just like uh I have to go online to date I have to go out and get dressed up it's All about why bother and you feel like The bad situations in your life are Happening to you And that you're powerless And you're trapped Now in that energy level two it's all About conflict And for some of you you might not get Into external conflict while some of you May But a lot of this conflict energy Looks like Conflict directed inward i call this the Boxing glove syndrome it's like you're Out there in the world every day with These metaphorical boxing gloves Protecting yourself bobbing weaving Making sure you don't get hurt Putting up a defense rejecting him Before you reject yourself

In conflict we also have self-doubt Perfectionism we compare ourselves Resentful we're jealous Sound Familiar i really want you to get honest Write down all of the thoughts All of them that i've thrown out there And really identify which resonate for You because this is what you are Broadcasting And that is what we have to change Here's the deal ladies Why do men want you to know that you're Leaking Because the good guys really want you to Know That it doesn't matter how beautiful you Are It's that if you have self-respect and Self-love and you're in that anabolic Zone You'll attract them And they really want you to love Yourself so that they can love you Now here's what happens When we're in that catabolic energy zone And that's what we're broadcasting We attract men That give us crumbs And that's no good We attract the men who disappear We attract the men who are elusive They're hot they're cold you're confused We attract the men who

Play us they give us just enough Attention and we start to think maybe They're interested and then they go away When you're in an anabolic level You attract men Who give you the whole cake One of my favorite stories in my dating Adventure is believe me i was dating men Who had lots of crumbs in fact i used to Joke that i was the girl who would get The plate of crumbs and i would just Like put my finger on the plate And try and lick off those crumbs that's How desperate i was i would take Anything and i rationalized that it was Okay or that they had potential Or that's what i deserved And when i was able to shift into that Anabolic zone and when my clients are Able to shift into that anabolic energy What they find is they get cake And i'll never forget On my third or fourth date with my guy The brit we were at a coffee shop and Out of nowhere he brought me an entire Cake And i laughed thinking you know what This process this system works i want For you to jump out of your romantic rut To get the cake Wouldn't you love that Wouldn't you love to feel like you had Self-worth That you had that sex appeal that you

Were in your feminine and you were able To receive Love and nurture but also be powerful Wouldn't you love to have the dating Savvy so that you knew how to respond to Men in the right way and that you were Okay jumping out of those vicious Circles and setting boundaries because You knew that you were worth the cake So all we have to do To get those amazing guys the guys that Are relationship ready Is to just become ten percent better Than ninety percent of the women out There in the dating jungle because Here's the deal ninety percent stay in Romantic ruts not just once not just Twice but for a lifetime So how do you do that Number one We have to help you to get self-worth We have to really get clear on what are All those beliefs that you had that we Threw out there Talking about the victim energy level And the conflict energy level We have to itemize those out one By one and then ultimately begin to Unwind them So how do you do that Well i'm going to give you four Questions that i want you to start Asking yourself Number one

What is the limiting belief what is the Belief write them all out Number two where did you learn them Where did they come from For most of us the men that were with Now are not those same men and we for Sure are not who we were when we first Learned some of these behaviors For some of you including me and a lot Of clients i work with i hear stories About these patterns starting in 6th Grade 7th grade 13 14 sometimes even Younger So how true are they really now The third question What does it cost you if you hold on to The past and all those beliefs what's at Stake and finally what would it look Like to let it go And if you can work through these Questions and get the answers that you See that evolve from working through This process Your esteem will start to go up And self-confidence ladies is hot and That is what makes you Jump into that ten percent better What else makes you 10 better than 90 of The women out there Sex appeal Now sex appeal isn't necessarily being Sexy or or skinny or big boobs or The perfect butt or no wrinkles Sex appeal is what i call being in your

Sexy alpha feminine energy the alpha Part is that you are confident that You're powerful that you know what you Want in life and you're not afraid to Articulate it and the feminine is that You know how to receive that you know How to be open that you know how to Identify your feelings and express them We're going to talk about some of those Skills in upcoming training videos so Make sure you look in your inbox for Video number two and video number three But the bottom line is this That i will tell you Men wish you knew this that when you're In that sexy alpha fem energy It is hot And then finally If you have dating savvy if you know What to say And how to say it if you know how to get Him to ask you out if you know how to Pursue without being aggressive if you Know how to receive if you know how to Get him to do what you want but in a way That makes him think that you're amazing If you know how to work the online Dating system if you know how to Understand men and communicate with them I am telling you ladies you are going to Be so desirable that you will be Clearly in that 10 percent better And here's what i know from talking to Men when you are in that 10

When you are 10 More attractive more together more Confident more sexy than the 90 that They see out there They walk away from that first date Sitting in their car Thinking She is someone that i want to know more About And that That is what makes you jump out Your romantic rut So now you have a moment of decision We talked at the beginning about your Vicious cycle And those arrows And ultimately now it's up to you to Decide Who will you choose to be in those Moments Will you choose to live into those old Catabolic thoughts Beliefs and actions Or will you choose to be a woman Who loves herself A woman who is confident A woman who has a value in what she Brings So that when she's getting crumbs She's able to say no Because she knows That she's worth the cake And that's how i want you to really Think about yourself

In the upcoming days and weeks is Identify those choice points in your Life and consider who do you choose to Be in those moments Will you walk towards the vision of the Life that you want or will you stay Stuck In your romantic rut It's up to you Believe me when i tell you you are at The cause of your relationship Success you can attract the men you want Not those men that you get Finally And it's by living into Being confident Having the skills and being in your Feminine powerful sexy self So here's your homework Number one I want you to start working on what i Call a judgment journal Notice and write down All of the beliefs and thoughts and Feelings that you have That seem to resonate with levels one And two energy as i describe them in This video get them all down on paper I want you to do that for at least seven Days And if you're high tech you can just Write them in little notes section of Your wireless phone Number two

I want you to create an ideal image of You being what i call super me Super me is a woman who is confident Because she has self-worth She sees her value I want you to imagine what would you be Like If you lived into that ideal image of Who you know that you can be Of the person that's hiding The true you Think about what is the ideal image of You being a sexy alpha femme being Powerful but being feminine Write that down create what is the image Of me In The vision of being sexy Powerful Vulnerable and open And then finally what's your ideal in Terms of dating savvy Write it down you might write i know What to say i'm confident when i answer Text i'm really good at getting men to Open up and express themselves i'm Comfortable saying yes i'm comfortable Saying no This ultimately is your vision of who You want to be Inside of that ideal relationship It's really important to write it down We call this concept blueprinting and in Order to really create something we have

To first create a vision of how we want To be And that's where your super me comes Into play And then finally i want you to use your Stop obsessing tool kit So here's one tool in the tool kit It's called stop Breathe and ask So when you find yourself in the vicious Cycle And you're starting to rationalize why You should not jump out why you keep on Living into it Here's the technique i want you to stop Stop the thought The negative thought For some people we have to create a Physical pattern interrupt so it might Mean that you get up you walk away you Get a drink of water you take a walk Around the block Then The bee Of stop breathe and ask is breathe and That's simple When we stop and we take in a deep Breath It's almost like we're invoking the Super me We take breath and we get calm and Clarity comes And then launch into the a which is ask Ask yourself what's really going on here

Where did i learn this how true is it Really what's it costing me And then make another choice and Hopefully that choice is to step out of Your romantic rut Now you have a lot of homework and i Think i've probably blown your mind and Given you a lot to think about taking Responsibility for you beginning to get The results that you want So do your homework and very soon in Your inbox you're going to get the Second training video and this is a Favorite it's called meet them animals And in this video video i'm going to Tell you Why the good guys really want you to Know this secret They want you to understand that if you Can pick the winners from the men who Aren't really In the same Vision that you are Your life will change what feels like Overnight I'm also going to actually tell you About the five different kinds of Manimals and you're gonna understand who You're dating and i will tell you that When women watch this video and really Understand them animals it's a giant Collective sigh of relief because you Know it's not you it's them And then you're empowered

To make a choice stay in it stay in the Rut or jump out And finally i'm going to teach you how To take back control of your love life And win the hearts of those good guys Congratulations for making it through This video pretty powerful stuff right Well guess what we got more coming in Fact you want to watch your inbox Because tomorrow i'm going to be Teaching you how to select wisely in Fact this is a secret men wish you knew So much so that the good guys are like Dying for you to understand how to Figure out who's the real deal and who's Just taking you for a ride Now you're going to want to make sure You really watch this because i'm Actually going to teach you One word And one phrase to look for And when you see this word or this Phrase showing up in your conversation With the guy you're dating you're going To know he's a player So do not want to miss that one now also I want to invite you to become part of Our facebook community seriously you Want to start hanging out with women who Date with dignity it'll help elevate Your mojo and help you get out of that Romantic rut faster trust me so join our Facebook page hit the little likey Button

And then also i want to give you a Little coaching here so i'd love for you To leave a comment in the box below tell Me what was your biggest aha what was Your biggest takeaway and give me one Action step that you're gonna follow to Jump out of your romantic rut now i read All of these and i'm gonna try as hard As i can soon fast to respond to you so That you can start to get some feedback On what's happening for you inside of This series All right so watch your inbox and get Ready we're taking it to a deeper level Next time video number two three secrets Men wish you new i'll see you then

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